Half Isn't Enough

I didn't take any Zoloft over the weekend, and the last couple of days, I've only taken half my usual dose. I'm not trying to wean myself--I think the pills either contribute to my nausea or make it worse, or at the very least, they damn sure don't make it better and the thought of swallowing anything half the time makes me want to retch. But given how I feel today, I think it's time to suck it up (literally) and take the regular full dose daily.

It's cloudy, and windy, and chilly. It's the last day of October. Halloween is one of my favorite holidays (it is so a holiday, bite me). But it's never been lost on me how Halloween can be mild right up to the end, and the next morning, November hits with a vengeance.

I'm trying to enjoy the day in spite of the fact Bob won't be trick-or-treating with us this evening. I'm planning to make my famous baked potato soup for dinner, and afterward carve up some pumpkins. Bob and I carved the small one he got on a field trip last night, but it wasn't enough to satisfy my pumpkin carving need.

Our "talk" with Bob last night was okay, I guess. I think we made our point. Unfortunately, we weren't able to make it without getting into an argument with each other. Ben thinks I'm over-protective of Bob, and maybe I am. But I still don't understand the whole male "I'm the Big Badass Father Figure" mentality. Why do men insist on thinking they're going to get results from being pricks? It irritates the shit out of me, whether it's Ben doing it or my own father or some idiot male I don't even know. Anyway, he started in with that attitude, and I chopped him off at the knees, but then he got all passive-aggressive on me and I basically told him to "shut up and go to work." And he did. And I didn't really feel bad about it. I don't enjoy fighting with him, but I don't really have the mental or physical energy right now to do any relationship hand-holding. So hopefully this is one of those things we can just move past without any major groveling.

In the meantime, I'm trying to look to the future with eager anticipation...Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday EVER), St. Louis (tagging along with Ben, he has to go for work), Christmas, New Years, spending winter preparing Moosebaby's room, summer and Moosebaby arrival, fall, and next Halloween, when I'll have TWO trick-or-treaters at my disposal...