Justice is not only blind, it's deaf. But certainly not mute.

Yesterday was the trial on db's family access motion. We started at 1:30. We didn't leave the courthouse until 5:00.

In the interim hours, db took the witness stand and (1) lied outright; (2) was caught lying outright on a few issues; (3) stated he felt an appropriate remedy for not having been allowed visitation since June would be for him to have Bob for the next 3 months with me getting alternate weekends, and that he had already taken the liberty of enrolling Bob in a new daycare for that time period. Then db's pigfaced whore of a girlfriend took the stand and lied through her teeth about multiple issues. She stated she "regretably" filed her motion for a protective order because "emotions were running high" and she felt just awful about it and should never have done it. I spent an hour on the witness stand being generally ass raped by db's stupid little pathetic piss ant lawyer, who would object to my answers and then sit there for several minutes wracking his brain trying to come up with an objection.

At one point, he asked me if I'd ever been treated by a psychiatrist.

Yes.

And what was your diagnosis?

Anxiety.

Wasn't that diagnosis in fact "bipolar?"

No. I have never been diagnosed as bipolar.

Unfuckingreal.

When the judge came back from chambers with his decision, he again lectured the courtroom occupants on how cases like this just "make him sick" and how he can't understand why two people can't just act like adults for the sake of the child. He told me it's not right for me to allow my child to decide who he talks to on the phone or doesn't talk to, and that I have to make Bob talk to db on the phone. The judge then said he was denying the family access motion, but that he was going to enforce the current parenting plan until such plan was amended by modification come trial. Meaning db gets his old visitation schedule--every other Thurs-Tues--starting next week.

I cried listening to this shit. I cried even as the judge told db that Bob needs to go to school if school is open, whether db likes it or not. I cried because it's just all such a fucking load of bullshit.

And now we face either having the motion to modify tried by this same judge and his line of Pollyanna, can't-we-all-just-get-along thinking, in the first 2 weeks of January--or waiting 6 months for another judge to be appointed and brought up to speed on the case. I don't want to wait that long--but I also don't want the case to be tried by this judge who seems to think everyone can have that Lifetime-Television-for-Women moment when the lightbulb goes on over their heads and say "oh, yeah, I should be thinking of my child's needs first."

It doesn't always fucking happen that way.

I'm just so fucking disgusted with the whole justice system. There is seemingly little justice actually involved in it.

I really don't want to talk about it any more right now. Just wanted to post an update in case anyone's paying attention out there...