I've Been T-Balled
Okay, I have to say it--
tee ball sucks. It blows. It sucks big donkey balls.
It was never my intention for Bob to be the next Zack Greinke (our cute but psycho pitcher), but I thought t-ball would at least be a chance for him to have some fun and get some exercise this summer.
Ha. Ha ha ha. Hahahahahahaha.
So far, all it's been is one big fucking headache for yours truly.
First there was the drama surrounding getting Bob signed up for t-ball, because that idiot-ass db didn't want any part of it and pitched a fit about me "forcing" him and Bob to do something they didn't want to do. So I signed Bob up anyway, because I thought it would be a good experience for him. An opportunity to be part of a team. The chance to make some new friends. An opportunity to succeed.
Silly me. Bob is, quite obviously, not team sports material. He has no concept of "team"--if anything, every practice seems to be an opportunity to out-shine his teammates, as if he's competing against them. And new friends? Don't bet on it. He's made sworn enemies with at least two boys on the team so far, and the rest of the kids, he doesn't give two shits about.
And now that db has decided to use t-ball as an opportunity to show the world what a Great Fucking Father he is, there's the added aggravation of having his stupid ass show up for every practice so far. Oh, he's very helpful, and very good at chatting up the other parents and coaches. He's also very good at creating additional distraction for Bob, who hardly needs any help with distraction. And last night, he decided to bring his ancient fucking dog to the park with him, creating yet another distraction.
Oh, well. Another month and a half and I can look back on all this and laaaaaugh. In the meantime, we're contemplating BMX. I admitted to Ben last night that he was probably right in his assessment of that as the perfect sport for Bob. There are no teams, the action is very on/off (as opposed to ball, where you spend a lot of time standing around), and there's no real concept other than "ride like hell and try not to die." Yeah, that sounds right up Bob's alley. I'm still paranoid as hell about another broken arm, but I've seen the kid take some pretty bitchin' falls on concrete, and I have to say, he knows how to take a fall.
I might even consider gymnastics in the fall. The kid has tremendous upper body strength and needs a positive outlet for it. And that outlet damn sure isn't going to be throwing fastballs.
tee ball sucks. It blows. It sucks big donkey balls.
It was never my intention for Bob to be the next Zack Greinke (our cute but psycho pitcher), but I thought t-ball would at least be a chance for him to have some fun and get some exercise this summer.
Ha. Ha ha ha. Hahahahahahaha.
So far, all it's been is one big fucking headache for yours truly.
First there was the drama surrounding getting Bob signed up for t-ball, because that idiot-ass db didn't want any part of it and pitched a fit about me "forcing" him and Bob to do something they didn't want to do. So I signed Bob up anyway, because I thought it would be a good experience for him. An opportunity to be part of a team. The chance to make some new friends. An opportunity to succeed.
Silly me. Bob is, quite obviously, not team sports material. He has no concept of "team"--if anything, every practice seems to be an opportunity to out-shine his teammates, as if he's competing against them. And new friends? Don't bet on it. He's made sworn enemies with at least two boys on the team so far, and the rest of the kids, he doesn't give two shits about.
And now that db has decided to use t-ball as an opportunity to show the world what a Great Fucking Father he is, there's the added aggravation of having his stupid ass show up for every practice so far. Oh, he's very helpful, and very good at chatting up the other parents and coaches. He's also very good at creating additional distraction for Bob, who hardly needs any help with distraction. And last night, he decided to bring his ancient fucking dog to the park with him, creating yet another distraction.
Oh, well. Another month and a half and I can look back on all this and laaaaaugh. In the meantime, we're contemplating BMX. I admitted to Ben last night that he was probably right in his assessment of that as the perfect sport for Bob. There are no teams, the action is very on/off (as opposed to ball, where you spend a lot of time standing around), and there's no real concept other than "ride like hell and try not to die." Yeah, that sounds right up Bob's alley. I'm still paranoid as hell about another broken arm, but I've seen the kid take some pretty bitchin' falls on concrete, and I have to say, he knows how to take a fall.
I might even consider gymnastics in the fall. The kid has tremendous upper body strength and needs a positive outlet for it. And that outlet damn sure isn't going to be throwing fastballs.
posted by Mitzi Green at 11:34 AM
2 Comments:
What about karate? My nephew is a high-strung child, spoiled rotten, but that' another issue I have with my "perfect" sister. But she started taking Tucker there because Tucker needed structure and an cool way to relieve all the excess energy. He really loves it.
Have a great weekend! Marcia
When they graduate to actual baseball it sucks just the same. Just not the sport for our "high spirited" children. Lori
Post a Comment
<< Home